"We Had to Fight for the Diagnosis" -- Autism Dad Brandon Shaw Gets Real About Life with Mason | S9E02
The Autism Dad Podcast | Seen and Heard Series | Season 9, Episode 2
When Brandon Shaw and his wife Alyssa finally got their son Mason's autism diagnosis, they expected answers. What they got was a piece of paper and a goodbye.
"There was no pamphlet, there was no directions, no step-by-step guide of what to do. It was basically like, okay, here's your diagnosis and have a good day."
That moment, equal parts relief and abandonment, is something so many autism families know all too well. And it's exactly the kind of raw, real experience that Seen and Heard was built to amplify.
In Season 9, Episode 2, I sat down with Brandon Shaw, an autism dad from Orlando, Florida, for about 15 minutes of honest conversation about his seven-year-old son Mason, his youngest son Hunter (almost 3), and what it actually looks like to raise an autistic child when the world hands you no map.
They Had to Fight Just to Get a Diagnosis
Before Brandon and Alyssa ever heard the word "autism" from a professional, they were turned away, twice, by two separate pediatricians. It took pushing until they reached a pediatric neurologist who finally did the testing and confirmed what the family had suspected. Mason was diagnosed around 2022-2023.
That fight before the finish line is exhausting in a way that's hard to explain to people outside this community. You're simultaneously advocating for your child, managing your own fears, and trying to hold everything together, all before you've even started processing what the diagnosis actually means.
Daily Life with Two Very Different Boys
Mason is seven, officially diagnosed as Level 1 autism, though Brandon is quick to point out that he teeters between Level 1 and Level 2 depending on the day. His younger brother Hunter is almost three, and raising the two of them together comes with the usual chaos of young siblings, fighting over toys, snack negotiations, stepping on things, plus the added layer of Mason's specific needs.
For Mason, regulation looks like noise-canceling headphones, sensory toys, controlled lighting in his room, and screen time as a tool, not just entertainment. These aren't indulgences. They're the things that help Mason function, and they're a big part of what separates his daily experience from Hunter's.
The Wins and Why They Matter
One of my favorite questions to ask every guest is about recent wins. Not the big, dramatic breakthroughs, though those count too, but the everyday moments that families in this community know are anything but ordinary.
Brandon had plenty to share.
Mason, who is in first grade, just started answering questions about his school day. To a parent outside this community, that might sound like nothing. For Brandon and Alyssa, it's a window into a world they previously had zero visibility into.
He's going to the bathroom independently. He's choosing to play with his younger brother. He's sitting down to work on his handwriting. He went on a Disney ride with a friend's parent, not Mom or Dad. And just this week, he picked up a glove and asked Brandon to play catch.
"Before you have kids, especially if you have a boy, you think like, oh, we're going to play catch and do all your standard things and it doesn't go that route. And this week he's shown interest in grabbing a glove and wanted to play catch with me."
That's a sentence that'll hit differently depending on where you're standing. If you're an autism parent, you already feel it.
Mason's Strengths Are Remarkable
Brandon also talked about what Mason can do, and it's genuinely impressive. Mason reads at a fourth-grade level. He memorizes books. He can script entire Pixar movies from start to finish, reciting every line as if he's holding the script.
Two nights before recording, Brandon watched Coco with him. Mason narrated the first 30 minutes scene by scene, word for word.
"It's just remarkable," Brandon said. And he's right.
At the same time, Mason still needs reminders to use the bathroom, help washing his hands, and support getting dressed. That's the reality of level overlap, extraordinary capability in some areas, genuine support needs in others. Both things are true at the same time.
Fighting for His Place in a Mainstream Classroom
Mason started his school journey in an autism-specific unit in pre-K and was eventually recommended to try mainstreaming. He's been in a general education classroom through kindergarten and most of first grade. He wears his headphones every day, has an IEP, and gets pulled out for support, but by all accounts, his classmates have embraced him.
That didn't come without a fight though. When the school principal witnessed Mason having a meltdown on one particular day, she suggested he didn't belong with the other kids. Brandon and Alyssa pushed back hard.
They won. Mason stayed.
What Brandon Wants the World to Understand
I asked Brandon what he wishes people outside the autism community understood about Mason and autistic people in general. His answer was clear.
Accept them. Just accept who they are.
He talked about the frustration of people defaulting to Rain Man-style stereotypes, and the loneliness of having close friends and family who don't know how to ask about Mason, not because they don't care, but because they're afraid of saying the wrong thing.
His message to those people? Just ask. When Mason jumps, it's because he's happy. When he hand-laughs, he's excited. Ask what he likes. Ask how you can help. That's it.
"Being different is not a bad thing, especially in the year 2026."
What Brandon Wants the Autism Community to Understand
This is the question that often surprises guests, and Brandon handled it beautifully.
He wants the autism community to come together. To stop measuring whose journey is harder. To embrace other families the way he hopes they'd embrace his.
"It's a team sport. We don't move forward if we're just going to judge and divide."
That's the whole thing, right there.
Listen to the Full Episode
You can hear Brandon's full story on Season 9, Episode 2 of the Seen and Heard series from The Autism Dad Podcast. Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major podcast platforms. The full video episode is also available on YouTube.
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